I think that the Exorcist movies, which oddly enough I've never seen, have made a huge impression on the cultural groupmind (or something). Because you say the word "exorcism" and it's immediately accompanied by images of floating beds and rotating heads and split pea soup. And the understatement of the exorcism above had me feeling quite unsettled, waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for *somebody* to open their eyes and have them be black or yellow or red or *something*, like the demon slipped through during the exorcism.
But really, I'm veryvery glad that didn't happen. Because what did happen, though so much quieter and more subtle and all, was just simply more effective. Well, once you (I) get past the cultural conditioning of that word.
Because ... it took bits of Dean with it?! And Dean's aware of memories that are missing - and emotional context that's missing for what's still there - and ... okay, part of that (some of the emotional context anyway) could still be related to his physical condition and physical traumas and emotional trauma and could come back. Or, of course, not. But part of him missing and probably gone for good. *gulp* That's big, that's major, that's scary ... and subtle, too.
And, moving right along though I may get back to this before the end, how much do I love the quiet moments and the character connection and the little (demon-haunted) breather they had. (And Dean can *still* hear that damn thing whispering at him? Is that supposed to be, after the exorcism, or did things not work as well as John and Sam think? Or ...)
Sam staying right with Dean, unable to leave his literal side, but unable to actually touch him. (Pictures two big men squeezed onto a twin bed, not touching. Makes my neck hurt just thinking about it.) John also staying so close.
And when Dean woke up, the "casual" resumption of Sam&Dean banter made my throat clench up. Because so much hidden pain, hidden fear. And when Sam left the room, I was really worried about what might happen between Dean and John (and demon).
The sneaky plan to do the exorcism while Sam was out of the room, right then, right there, totally took me by surprise. Which, thinking about it now, is surprising in itself because it's a totally Winchester thing to do, and a totally John & Dean protecting Sammy thing to do.
It's Sam, Dean told his dad. *flail* *heart clench* Though I can't help but wonder if that translates as "he's a man now" or as "only *I* get to call him Sammy".
But Sam was too tricky for them - he was checking to see what they were up to when they thought his back was turned. Probably knew immediately that they were trying to get him out of the way, shielding "little Sammy" (and yeah, answer right there seems at least to be "only I get to call him Sammy") - because that's what they do - and Sam was too clever for them.
Holding Dean's head in his lap. *whimper* And ... what *did* he do with his big scary psychic brain during the exorcism. Turned that charm cord black? Does that mean it's used up or "just" that things got a little hot for a while. (See me, once again getting snarled up in a detail.) And Sam's head was already feeling all raw and stretched out *before* the exorcism. And there was bleeding from the nose again. *worries*
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timeasmymeasure
1 of 2 (again)
Date: 2006-06-04 09:28 am (UTC)I think that the Exorcist movies, which oddly enough I've never seen, have made a huge impression on the cultural groupmind (or something). Because you say the word "exorcism" and it's immediately accompanied by images of floating beds and rotating heads and split pea soup. And the understatement of the exorcism above had me feeling quite unsettled, waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for *somebody* to open their eyes and have them be black or yellow or red or *something*, like the demon slipped through during the exorcism.
But really, I'm veryvery glad that didn't happen. Because what did happen, though so much quieter and more subtle and all, was just simply more effective. Well, once you (I) get past the cultural conditioning of that word.
Because ... it took bits of Dean with it?! And Dean's aware of memories that are missing - and emotional context that's missing for what's still there - and ... okay, part of that (some of the emotional context anyway) could still be related to his physical condition and physical traumas and emotional trauma and could come back. Or, of course, not. But part of him missing and probably gone for good. *gulp* That's big, that's major, that's scary ... and subtle, too.
And, moving right along though I may get back to this before the end, how much do I love the quiet moments and the character connection and the little (demon-haunted) breather they had. (And Dean can *still* hear that damn thing whispering at him? Is that supposed to be, after the exorcism, or did things not work as well as John and Sam think? Or ...)
Sam staying right with Dean, unable to leave his literal side, but unable to actually touch him. (Pictures two big men squeezed onto a twin bed, not touching. Makes my neck hurt just thinking about it.) John also staying so close.
And when Dean woke up, the "casual" resumption of Sam&Dean banter made my throat clench up. Because so much hidden pain, hidden fear. And when Sam left the room, I was really worried about what might happen between Dean and John (and demon).
The sneaky plan to do the exorcism while Sam was out of the room, right then, right there, totally took me by surprise. Which, thinking about it now, is surprising in itself because it's a totally Winchester thing to do, and a totally John & Dean protecting Sammy thing to do.
It's Sam, Dean told his dad. *flail* *heart clench* Though I can't help but wonder if that translates as "he's a man now" or as "only *I* get to call him Sammy".
But Sam was too tricky for them - he was checking to see what they were up to when they thought his back was turned. Probably knew immediately that they were trying to get him out of the way, shielding "little Sammy" (and yeah, answer right there seems at least to be "only I get to call him Sammy") - because that's what they do - and Sam was too clever for them.
Holding Dean's head in his lap. *whimper* And ... what *did* he do with his big scary psychic brain during the exorcism. Turned that charm cord black? Does that mean it's used up or "just" that things got a little hot for a while. (See me, once again getting snarled up in a detail.) And Sam's head was already feeling all raw and stretched out *before* the exorcism. And there was bleeding from the nose again. *worries*
*continued*