day 2

[nilchance]

I've spent most of day 1 and 2 either in a brain fog or napping. (napping may not be the word; it's mostly just laying in bed with my eyes closed because I'm too tired to do anything else.) yesterday we watched about half an episode of Great British Bakeoff before realizing that I was zoning out and needed to go rest. I wake up ravenous, eat a little something, get sleepy, and crash again. which is what my body needs at the moment, apparently, but it makes for very boring blogging.

I'm still not sleeping great at night. that's probably the result of naps and needing to get up at 11pm, 1am, and 3am to take various pills. plus I'm typically a side sleeper, and now I've got drains and stern instructions to lay on my back on a wedge pillow to stay elevated. it's hard to do more than doze.

I've been more sore this morning than yesterday. I believe the nerve block is running out. I've definitely been in worse pain than this, but it's not exactly pleasant. I'm a little irked about the lack of narcotics with no prior warning, but I'm managing.

I was originally sad that I cancelled a session of a d&d game for 2 days out, and I kept another game tentatively on the calendar for day 3 because what if I felt up to playing after all? and let me say to myself: LOL, you nerd, you're not up to sitting in front of a computer for 3 hours and concentrating on anything. luckily that game was officially cancelled for other reasons and I don't have to sheepishly tell the group that I can't do it.

I keep going in the bathroom and turning sideways to stare in the mirror at how flat my chest is. even with the swelling and the padding, it looks so different and so good. I can't wait until the postop when I can hopefully get these drains out and see my results for the first time. until then: naps.

Comments

[tabaqui]

Naps and snacks are exactly what you need!
Since you are being forced to lay/sleep in a semi-upright position, make sure you're getting up and moving around some when you can; it's hellishly easy to get a pressure sore (I know, I got one after three days in a hospital bed post-surgery).

Keep on keepin' on, you seem to be doing good! I'm glad the outcome is already making you happy.

[dine]

it sounds like you're doing the right things, and the fog will likely lift soon.

it's great that your body looks right in the mirror. so happy for you

[batdina]

I can't wait to hear from you when you see it for the first time. It's an awesome feeling.

[nilchance]

oh heck yes, I'm being a little paranoid about pressure sores. a lot of getting up and moving around the apartment to prevent that and blood clots.

thank you! <3

[nilchance]

the fog is already so much better this morning. I can actually focus on stuff. \o/

thank you! I'm definitely getting a nice hit of gender euphoria every time I look in the mirror.

[nilchance]

I'm really looking forward to it! I'm microdosing on that feeling every time I look in the mirror, but I can only imagine the joy of seeing the actual results.