Invisible Illness Awareness Week continues...

[nilchance]

Fortuitous timing: a woman with an invisible disability speaks out about parking. It's from a Christian news site, but the writer is concentrating on disability issues, not her faith.

ETA: edited to clarify.

Comments

[mahoy.livejournal.com]

My sister has a disorder called Epidermolysis bullosa that causes painful blisters to develop on her feet. This is a genetic disorder that she's struggled with all her life, and it makes her life miserable quite often. It doesn't help that she lives in Las Vegas, which is essentially a giant slab of heat-radiating black pavement.

I've begged her over the years to pick up a handicap tag or license plate to no avail. She's simply too afraid of being criticized for "taking up space" that should be going to someone who is "really handicapped."

It's frustrating and sickening.

[nilchance.livejournal.com]

Your sister's comment about being afraid that she's "taking up space" breaks my heart. I'm sorry she has to go through that.

[tabaqui]

While i know a couple people who use 'grandmas' placard 'cause they're asshats, i can't imagine saying anything to anyone who uses a disabled space in a parking lot. Jayzus. Takes some nerve to play doctor on the asphalt at the horrible Wal-Mart!

*that, and my sis-in-law has fibromyalgia, and while she hasn't needed to use a 'disabled' space or placard yet...there's no telling. And gods knows she'll get looks and judgment, because she's an overweight woman with four kids.*

[nilchance.livejournal.com]

Exactly! Especially when it takes some DOCTORS years to figure out these disorders, let alone some jerkoff with more judgment than sense. Ugh. And I'm sorry to hear about your SIL; I'm also overweight but I don't have to deal with the additional stigma of having kids with me, which (somewhat bizarrely) makes a woman less of a PERSON in the public eye, even though that public swears they value mothers.

[tabaqui]

Yes yes. She made some bad choices in her life *her exs* but her kids are healthy, happy, talented and smart. She takes care of them as well as half her fucked up family and makes sure that they get to enjoy things like dance lessons and movies and trips to the park.

But of course, she's fat and has four kids. Must be a lazy-ass slut/welfare mom/loser who's 'cheating the system'.

*hates people*

[morgandawn.livejournal.com]

nowadays I just focus on whether they have the blue parking sticker/tag - if they do, enough said

[nilchance.livejournal.com]

Exactly! If the DMV gives it to them, I'm not one to judge.

Once my mom, who had the tag displayed and was using a cane, was ticketed by a parking attendant who thought she didn't look disabled enough to have that tag. It took SIX MONTHS to get that fine erased from her record.

[morgandawn.livejournal.com]

I also point out that it is not the DMV that makes the disability call - it is the family doctor who does. So unless they want to argue with my doctor - in which case feel free to call her and she'll fill you in on my medical history. and then they can call social security disability administration. and then they can call my employer's disability program.

and then they can call my cousin Vinnie who *loves* to ...explain...things to people.

personally, what I do is this - unless I am seriously hurting (like today) and/or there is no parking in my walking radius, I always leave the handicapped spots free because there may be people who need it more than me - that day.

[alysonwonderlan.livejournal.com]

Bill used to drive his grandmother (she has been in a wheel chair for years) many places. He would normally drop her off at the front door (with whomever else was with them) and park the car, though it had handicap plates, in a non-handicap parking spot. One time when leaving the mall, he left his grandmother just inside the doors and went to get the car from far away and parked in a handicap spot close to the door so that he could go get his grandmother and bring her out. And of course some woman decided to make a nasty comment about the fact that he wasn't handicapped and walked away before Bill could retort. We can only hope that she saw him walking back OUT of the mall wheeling his grandmother.

[nilchance.livejournal.com]

Ugh. That's horrible. Poor Bill; he's being a good grandson and catching it anyway!

[darktouch.livejournal.com]

Oh, she heard my retort that I was picking up my Grandmother.. she just didn't believe me. I got a loud obnoxoious "Whatever" as I ran into the Mall.

[meredevachon]

Grandmother has a bad habit of not taking her cane with her unless she's having a really bad day (even though it's almost impossible to predict when she's going to have a flare and a decent day turn into a really bad one), so days she doesn't have it, I'm more likely to park in the handicap spot. But she doesn't look 81, so we still get nasty looks and comments. And like the other commenter, I've had problems when having to park long enough to pick her up from somewhere too.

OTOH, the lady who stays with my aunt during the day tries to take grandmother's van when she does any shopping/other errands, because it's got a handicap parking placard. And I know more than enough about her health history. She doesn't need the parking space. One of the many things about her that pisses me off.

[iyalode.livejournal.com]

Excellent article, thanks for the link. My 16yr old niece has an auto immune disease. And yeah, my sis has a handicapped parking pass because of it. Because C can go from a bubbly teen to a drooping dead weight quicker than you can blink. And we've got those looks. Those 'you look fine to me' accusing stares.

Fuck 'em. If someone's not wearing an eyepatch it doesn't mean they're not a pirate, if you know what I mean.