Jensen's nightmares taunt him with what could have been and it's terrifying that he can be hurt physically in them too ...

I hinted at it in the fic, but since I watched Nightmare on Elm Street (where Johnny Depp was EATEN BY A BED), I've been haunted by that concept. I mean, you have to sleep sometime. Brr.

I know she was the love of Jensen's life but he was, it seems, more in love with her than she was with him.

Bingo. Yes. And Jensen is still fighting the fact that he's very, very pissed at her in addition to mourning her.

Thank you so much!